Just Within Inertia's Hold

Einstein once mused "All of science is nothing more than the refinement of everyday thinking."

I always used to just accept all the quotations of the world.  As I grew older I lamented not listening, learning exactly what it meant to believe they were true.  At that point I was saved as I finally discovered how smart I was--that I could apply them all by myself.

I have always envied how carefree and happy people seemed to be.  I have that attention--deficit--can't--fucking-listen disorder, the one thing I can fully blame on my parents..  And that's enough censure placed for me, honestly. So, being socially weird, I enjoyed being with people, people of all kinds, as they kept me sane and reminded me what impulses of mine should be appropriate.  They kept me (more) normal yet gave me hope that one day I'll be a real boy--able to stand up to those who intimidate me.

I really shouldn't have masturbated so much.  I'd say I'm fucked by now but...that would be a lie.

Eh.

So how is this relevant...ah, I remember now.  I remembered I said before that I learned everything about the social codes of inter- and intra-personalities by observation and experimentation of the human species and culturing myself with books.  Being around everyone so often kept those skills sharp, so obviously my mood became fragile and distant as I started losing contact with the people I knew.

When I finally went to college at James Madison University last year my mind became so open--very much like the other nine-thousand freshmen.  Unfortunately, my opening was more of a concussion than a concise lobotomy, with mild side effects such as depression and what seems like a failed attempt at being schizophrenic.  I wish my brain would be something that fits into a diagnosis so I can actually get help.  A contributor to my brain damage was how I started losing people I had known so well, which had me lose touch with all those social rules the world seems to bend around (time is relative and bends around the person!) since I apparently taken them for granted.

Though for some reason I did not mope about it, really; instead I tried learning about too much to count and building up some intelligence.  Think of it as peering through of an elevator (representative of being a naturally smart bull-shitter) and realizing the only way to survive is to suck it up, build your strength and your world together from nothing and run through the glass walls onto the stairs (representative of pick your ass up and make yourself worth something for once).  If you don't?  Inevitably you will be seized by the shadows of suicide, the curtains of claustrophobia, the perilous parachute thing that your second grade class would play the game of 'toss it up and down please, children'.

So what Einstein is saying is that everyone speaks of and around the same principles and concepts, and that there are as many ways to look at them as there are coded neurons in our brain.  I had to build my perception ("train" my neurons, if you will) and the world back up from the abyss of depression, and what I found and am still discovering is that I was absolutely right about everything.  But I would never apply it to myself--only others were worthy of a full concept of self.

So throughout my journey towards what i hope to be the ultimate reality I've found that everything correlates.  For instance, neuroscience has buckets of truth within it's research--it describes the exact phenomena which we already talk and muse about but in terms so majestic and microscopic it makes me weep in revelry.  If you're curious, one very understandable and widely applicable concept is that of "neuroplasticity"; you won't be disappointed.

I personally suggest to everyone to study, read, and question to no end to unearth the secrets within your brain and among our world which will only make you happier, healthier and wealthier.  I've discovered so much in such a small amount of time about a vast variety of topics--the most important of which is that wisdom and advice is not something to be selfish about.  We are all humans, we all struggle with the same problems over and over again, and if we continue to keep our depressions and curiosities to ourselves we will inevitably fall as a race.  That's the 'or else'--be wary.



                   "The life of the individual has meaning only insofar as it aids in making the life of every living thing nobler and more beautiful"